3 August 2022
Daughter
Let's convert my basement into a dog park. Then they can run around without smashing their heads anymore.
Mom
Good idea. They ran faster today. I have to fence the area around the garden, then they can run in circles. Glad it doesn't last forever. They wrestled on one of the bushes and it's flat now.
Daughter
I think Wiley pooped on that one.
4 August 2022
Mom
They tore around in the dirt, so got the pond out with water. That brought it to another level. About an hour's worth of play.
Daughter
Wow, can't wait to see the water action!
Mom
Going to meet friends for dinner. Probably leave at 4:15 is that ok?
Daughter
Yup
[4 hours later]
Mom
Heading back with tacos.
Daughter
Thank the lord. The pond is mostly inside now, btw.
6 August 2022
Dad
Are you ready to leave the house?
Mom
No, I have to shower
Dad
Oh, you didn't have time yet today?
Mom
Well, after picking up poop in the yard three times, cleaning up toys, distributing enough chewys to maintain my sanity, replacing used pee pads, washing bedding with pee on it, trying to teach puppies how to play nice and be quiet before the neighbors complain, making sure Emma eats her food and not someone else, making sure no one chokes or strangles themselves, somehow I did not have time to shower yet, no.
8 August 2022
Daughter
I think I need to get one of those robot vacuums. Wiley just had a clinger with one of my hairs and he freaked out. I couldn't catch him but he finally whipped it off in the driveway. Glad I got those baby wipes.
Mom
Keep those handy. Gloves too.
10 August 2022
Daughter
Somehow Willow managed to pee on one of her favorite toys, on the driveway.
Mom
Wouldn't be the first time.
13 August 2022
Mom
When was the last time they went out?
Daughter
About 45 min ago. Wiley pooped in two different spots, and the smell goes through the whole backyard. I picked up the rest earlier, so there's nothing else back there. I wonder if the neighbor can smell it.
Mom
I think they toured some new houses today.
15 August 2022
Daughter
Wiley was sleeping and puked a bunch of kibble out, then started to eat it.
Mom
Make sure he has water.
17 August 2022
Daughter
Why does the back porch smell like a dirty butt?
Mom
It's the new chew sticks.
Daughter
Oh. These new toys smell like butt now too. Willow said hi to me with her mouth, glad to know she didn't actually eat poop.
19 August 2022
Mom
Watch where you're stepping in the backyard. I picked up poop 2 or 3 times today so they didn't wrestle in it but not sure if I missed some.
Daughter
Forgot to tell you, Wiley pooped on one of the walking path stones yesterday.
Mom
That must be the one I stepped on while they were chasing each other and barking. I started swearing at them and I think the neighbor was outside.
Daughter
Was it the shoes sitting by the back door?
Mom
No
Daughter
Oh, I think there's poop on those too, just fyi.
20 August 2022
Daughter
Collected my quota of poop today. FYI, lost a turd in the bushes. It was attached to a hair in Wiley's butt. Then he ran into the bushes and came back without it.
Mom
Ok, good to know.
Mom
The food for Emma [the OG dog] is in the fridge. You can mix in some raw hamburger too. Then the puppies will eat it when you forget to watch.
22 August 2022
Daughter
The dogs were digging right next to the fence again. I swept the dirt back, but it didn't fill in the hole all the way?
Mom
Yeah I noticed that. Not sure where it's going.
23 August 2022
Daughter
They seem to like the squeaky toys now that they figured out how they work. Starting to sound pretty rough.
Mom
Yeah didn't realize how violent a squeaky toy could sound.
25 August 2022
Daughter
Wiley just had the biggest poop I've seen yet. Like a 2 for 1.
Mom
Good. Must be eating enough.
Daughter
Think I need to wait a few days to pick that one up. Needs to dry out.
27 August 2022
Daughter
They were fighting again, in the middle of all their nice toys. Wiley was mad that Willow was chewing on a rock and wouldn't let him have it.
Mom
Wouldn't be the first time. They carry those around like treasures. Not sure where they find them but I keep throwing them away. Then there's more.
28 August 2022
Mom
They were playing really aggressively today, worse than ever before. I had to break it up. Then I found a poop on the patio like one of them got too excited to make it to the yard.
Daughter
Sounds like a shit show.
29 August 2022
Daughter
I picked up some poop while you were gone.
Mom
Thanks. It's a daily harvest. Or twice daily.
Daughter
A little lost piece always seems to find my shoe.
30 August 2022
Mom
They need to learn not to jump at faces. Willow almost broke my nose yesterday. Made me so mad.
Daughter
Yeah she almost popped my eyeball today. Good aim.
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